FARM FANS: We have about 2 weeks to Make America Strawberry Again. No, it’s not because the Orange One will raise his pumpkinny pennant over the Very White House on July 4 and declare victory over democracy – that quaint little relic of a bygone epoch. It’s simply that all the strawberries will be picked by around Independence Day, when, as luck would have it, we will be celebrating our collective escape from the madness of a bygone tyrant who propounded his own most dubious tax package. (A fellow who could never be jailed for obstruction or taking “oppo” intel from foreign agents because he was an actual real-life KINGGGG.)
Anyway, 33% off pick-a-peck strawberries. Just in case the new federal tax plan hasn’t trickled down to your level yet, don’t worry. You can get ahead of the 1% by saving 33% on berries. Come pick your own peck. A peck is 8 quarts. A quart is $7. That would make a peck $56 in normal numbers. But not for Farmketeers! Pick your own peck for only $38! Thus you will save $18. Works out to about $4.75 a quart. The volume discount kicks in at a peck, so you’ve got to come ready with a can-do attitude. If you don’t know what to do with 8 quarts… share berries with your neighbors and best frenemies. They will think you thought of them without being prompted. (Old farmer trick.)
Jam special: Get super-ripe strawberries (prepicked) for only $5/quart while supplies last. Farmer Alice sent a last-minute text before newsletter time. Said there’s berries that got slightly overripe with all the sitting around on rainy days waiting for fairweather pickers. Perfect for jam sessions. You don’t have to pick these berries. We got em ready for ye.
Rhubarb. Goes with strawberries to make pie. Everyone should know that by now but we won’t say “duh” since everybody can’t know everything. Garrison Keillor – erstwhile monarch of the radio variety show – used to sing about strawberry-rhubarb pie. But allegedly he got too “handsy” so the tune is fading. He and Uncle Biden should chat about personal touching policies in their folksy schticks. Someone could write that one-act play. A Prairie Home President?
Donuts are back and better than ever. The Mark II Donut Robot started last weekend with a clang-blang-and-a-whimper, but now she’s pumping out cidericious frybombs with aplomb. Every Saturday and Sunday 11:00 to 5:00. Sprinkle yours with SIN-amon sugar or eat them unadulterated.
Apple cider, “Orchard Ambrosia,” Nectar of the Gods, er, Dogs. Yes, surprise, surprise. We still have the last apples of last harvest – “keepers” as they call them, apples that store well. And we’re pressing them into cider til it’s gone. It’s like October in June. But don’t be scared. It’s still just June.
Blueberries at the stand. None for u-pick, just packed and ready for taking home. They might be good smushed up on your donuts. Or ganged up on waffles with strawbs.
Garlic scapes. These are Farmer Greg’s savory specialty. About 94.3% of you have never tasted garlic scapes. You can’t parade around town acting all foodie if you haven’t sizzled these in a pan or pickled them for off-season munchings. Scape season is short. Try a tangle. (Pictured with basil.)
Love to y’all. Hope to see you at The ‘Creek.